Emmanuel

My eighth grandchild....my third grand son, Emmanuel. Emmanuel was born with Sickle Cell Anemia, type SS. He is six months old. He is a chortling, funny, beautiful, handsome, mischievous, teasing, bundle of boy. He has just learned to sit by himself and to crawl. It's a funny crawl, but it is mobility and he is on the go.

Emmanuel was born to my single daughter, Sarah. Sarah works two jobs and her daddy and I take care of Emmanuel while she is at work. It takes both of us alot of the time.

For Emmanuels first five months of life, he was pretty much like any other normal baby. During his sixth month he has been to the hospital three times. One of those times was very scary. The staff thought at one point that he wasn't going to live. Inside, I was falling apart, while my face stayed serious but serene. I watched Emmanuel lay in the hospital baby crib, moaning while he slept. He didn't move. He was very pale. He had already been poked and prodded, an IV started and wrapped around his little arm.

Our little town is very blessed to have a hospital. It is not a big hospital with specialists that know how to take care of Sickle Cell kids. The staff is learning as they go. Emmanuel is one of two people in the state of Wyoming with this disease. The nearest specialist is in Denver, CO.

They talked of care flighting him to Denver and we tried to prepare our hearts for whatever was going to happen.

There was a period of time during that hospital stay when I was in the room by myself with Emmanuel. I looked at him laying there, so very sick and helpless and little and my heart took over and I wept. I closed my eyes and prayed for strength. I had long ago put Emmanuel in my Heavenly Fathers arms for His care. But still, I am flesh and blood and this is my baby grand son. Tears dripped off my face. I wasn't sobbing. I was releasing Emmanuel yet again to our Father.

A nurse came into the room and asked me if I was OK. I told her that I was OK....only because God was with me. With Him I can stand because He can bind up my weak knees.

Eventually Emmanuel got better and we were allowed to take him home. He wasn't 'well' but he was very slowly getting better. There were a few more complications....more narcotic pain relievers....alot more rocking and singing and praying over him, more tears and more tears.

We have many that we know of praying for Emmanuel and for those of us who take care of him. I find out nearly every day of someone else who emails and says they have been praying for us and want to know how Emmanuel is.

Today, as I sat a moment to rest, I thought of my other eight grandchildren. I particularly thought of my youngest grandson, Samuel who was born about six weeks after Emmanuel. I have never held him or sang to him. I'm not even sure if I bought him something when he was born. I don't know him like I know Emmanuel. I miss that.

It's not 'fair'. Not to Samuel and not to me. But it is what it is. Samuel, along with his brother and sisters and parents are planning to come visit in July. I am looking forward to that so very much! I imagine them all being here and the kids all running around and squeeling in our living room. Emmanuel will love them being here. I plan to get to know my newest grandson. I plan to take HIM shopping and buy HIM an outfit and a toy. I want him to know he is very special to me.

I want Emmanuel to know that he has wonderful cousins and aunts and uncles who love him and pray for him.

The journey of life is a challenging one. I know I am just a pilgrim here.....a stranger in a strange land and I look forward to a better place, where there is no more sickness, no more tears, no more death, no more thousands of miles seperating us from our loved ones. Thank you God for my NINE grandchildren. Every single one of them.