President Obama Stirs Me To Post

This is one of those events in my life where I am surprised at myself. Several years ago as a resident of Illinois, my attention was drawn to a 'young' black man that was running for the Senate. I listened to him speak and tho there were topics that we did not agree on, still he drew me to himself and encouraged my spirit.

Now, this 'young' man is president of my country. I live in Wyoming, far away from the hustle and bustle of the Chicago area where I once lived and where Senator Obama reigned.

I watched, with that same draw this past Tuesday during the swearing in. I wasn't at home. I was at WalMart....and all the TV's blared out the words that were promised by our new president.

I was very interested. I wanted to see this historic event. I have two bi racial children, whose coloring is much like President Obama's.

I know most of my fellow Christians disdain him. I've heard them, loud and clear. I always wonder how God feels about what they say and so loudly proclaim both in public and in private.

I've been quiet about my voting this time. My husband knows who I voted for and my children know. Other than that, it was a private time between my God and I and my country.

As I watched the swearing in, I feared that my intense interest might draw attention from fellow Wyomingites who for the most part are anti Obama folks. Then, I chided myself for my lack of courage. I am an American Citizen who SHOULD be watching the inauguration of our new president.

Do I have fears about him being president? Yes, I do. I vote Independant, but usually Republican. I vote for who I believe will be the one that possess the most integrity, honesty, hard working, God fearing man.

I am not always proven correct by the end of the term. I pray about my decision but once the president has been decided, I am by scripture, commanded to respect and honor and obey him.

I haven't seen this from my fellow Christians lately. I am embarrassed by the words I have heard out of their mouths. It makes me all the more determined that I will NOT speak evil against the one that God has put into office, even if I do not agree, even if he does ungodly things. I was remembering today that when we, as Christians were commanded to 'honor the emperor'...just who that emperor was and what HE stood for. Shudder!

Oh God, make me an instrument of your peace, Where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; where there is sadness, joy;

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood as to understand; to be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive; it is in pardoning that we are pardoned; and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

Amen!

A Cup of Mocha, Please

As you have read in a previous posting, our old dog, Sami was laid to rest December 31st of last year. Knowing that the day was coming when he would have to give up his life, my youngest daughter, Sarah bought me a puppy last July for my birthday. This puppy is a Chihuahua that my sweet husband, Kevin named "Mocha".

Mocha is now seven months old. He doesn't look like a puppy anymore, but he is DEFINATELY still abiding by puppy laws.

First and foremost he is very cute and very sweet. I am a sap for those big brown eyes of his. He can be so very naughty and yet look at me with those big browns and I melt...well, almost all of the time.

Not so melting am I when I see HOLES he has put in our carpet. We've tried vinegar, we've tried cayenne pepper sprinkled around so he doesn't think the carpet is one of his gazillion toys to 'play' with. Didn't work.

The vet said to get chewy toys for him so he has something to chew on. He has dozens....didn't work.

We've read on internet web sites to give the pups more attention...that they are lacking in attention when pups behave in this fashion. We gave more attention (was this even possible???) and still....didn't work.

We have contracted with a carpet fixer to have the carpet repaired. If this continues, we will have to replace the carpet (we rent).

The weather here in Wyoming can get very cold, especially at night. So, instead of using the doggie outhouse (grass), our Mocha uses the throw rug by the doggie door. It IS better than him using the carpet...yes yes.....but still, he KNOWS that is wrong and slinks around the morning after.

When guests come, he jumps and barks. When guests leave, he jumps and barks. When anyone walks past our house....he runs like an attack dog and barks. If you leave something (like my panties) on the floor in your room...you know, a PRIVATE place in the house.....he finds them and carries them to the front deck to greet your guests that are coming for lunch. How appetizing.

But, at the close of day....when my work is done, and I am in my nightgown and snuggled in my recliner....he is also in the crook of my arm, nuzzling close and snoozing away. What peace he brings to me.

I'll make it through another day if you will just give me "another cup of Mocha, please".

Church Business Meetings

It's business meeting Saturday. Honestly, I hate these once a month or once a quarter meetings. My stress level is soaring, no matter how much I am praying for the men involved and especially for my precious and dear husband.

It almost irratates me that Kevin says that he is peaceful over the meeting. Doesn't he realize all that can go wrong during one of these?

I am sure it is my past experiences--probably some intermingled Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome that needs to be addressed with my counsellor :)

I am waiting at home to pray and wonder and fret (even tho God has said "Fret Not!"), wringing my hands in anticipation of seeing what the look on my husbands face will be when he returns home. I hate this.

I am sure that is not the good Christian ministers wife attitude that I should have. But here I am, confessing it is the one that pervades my mind today.

What will be the outcome of the difficult things the men are discussing? Will it be that our burdens as ministers will be heavier? Lighter? About the same?

Will the men be one in mind and spirit and come to agreement.

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My husband has returned from the mens meeting. The information that he shares with me is not good. The traumatic stress is up front and in my face again. I feel so frustrated that so many men do not stand up for what is good and right and just let things slide. I've seen it all my life and it not only irks me, it grieves me. Where are the leaders that GOD would raise up?

There's much, as a ministers wife that I cannot write here just because of who I am and the job that is entrusted to me. I am seared this morning.

If you are a believer and you pray, please pray for us. There are decisions to be made that are not easy ones. They are grevious to us. Not what we had planned. Sigh.

It would be great if Jesus would just return and we could be done with all this earth trash.

Do You Take Kevin?

Remember the words the minister said..."Do you take Kevin?"....to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward....blah, blah, blah

It's been 31 years 4 months and 4 days and one hour ago. I didn't know way back then, what a wonderful, wonderful man God had blessed me with. I thought I knew. There was no way I could have known or foreseen what the years ahead would bring and how Kevin and I would meld together and become one.

This man, this wonderful, precious and sweet man is my husband. Sometimes I am still overwhelmed with the wonder of it.

We have gone through many seasons in our life together. After marrying we had all of about two months before I got pregnant with our first child. He was born about a month and a half before our first wedding anniversary. We really never knew time just the two of us as our first pregnancy was one where I threw up every single day, several times a day, and fainted at the most inoportune times.

Israel was born in July, I miscarried shortly thereafter and then was pregnant again in January, birthed second child in October, miscarried shortly thereafter and then pregnant again in March and delivered third baby in December. Had my tubes tied and found out I was pregnant at my six weeks check up. OOPS. We miscarried that baby and had another tubaligation.

When our third child was a year old, we put in an application to become foster parents. We've had 17 foster children over the years. Ten years after our first child, we adopted two children, twins--a boy and a girl, newborn.

Total children: 5.

Days were taken up in the intensity of having three babies in three years and grieving the death of three other infants. The intensity sometimes was overwhelming, but it also was full of laughter, joy at watching the ever learning and growing children, celebrating EVERY holiday, finding reasons to have another party and in all of that, Kevin and I were growing up, too.

Kevin and I shared parenthood. When the older kids were preschool, Kevin would come home from work and while I cleaned up after dinner, Kevin would run the kids through their baths, dress them for bed and then tell them a story and pray with them.

This ritual was repeated with differing details even as the children grew older. They loved their daddys stories and just the other day, Jonathan (now 20 years old) referenced a story that Kevin had told when Jon was about four years old. ha.

The kids continued to get older.....the intensity of having babies changed to the intensity of elementary school, then junior high and then high school. We had teenagers for thirteen years! We went through changing diapers to changing hairstyles, gobs of hairspray, rolled hem jeans, Israel wearing only black or grey, puffed bangs, t-ball, regular ball, basketball, Little Miss Texas, football, learning to play various instruments, having valedictorians, historians and barely graduating by the skin of their teeth.

College came and went, some graduated, some did not....and then, Daddy Kevin got his degree....with his grown kids cheering him on. Go Kevin.

We moved 47 times, created many houses into homes, realized home was the people (us), lived in many different states, met many wonderful people, grew and changed and journeyed together spiritually, studying the Bible and making many decisions.

We have been empty nesters and then welcomed children back home. Discovered grandchildren are awesome! We now have nine.

We are still becoming one and Kevin still says, "I do".

We have entered the last half of our lives. We contemplate 'going home' and the joy that will follow for us. Our lives now are pretty much lives of service for others. Kevin is getting his Masters in Counselling. He NEEDS to learn more about that so our service will be more profitable for others. It stretches us and grows us for him to pursue this. It is good.

Our lives continue to change, to become more one, to have great joys and deep sorrows and dissappointments. Our parents are getting quite old. I have one grandparent left alive on the earth. Our parents have aging issues. We live a long way from them. That is hard. We understand each others feelings about this because we share it.

Our children are across the country in Virginia and Chicago...and two are here. Likewise, grandchildren.

When we were first married Kevin held me and said, "Grow old along with me, the best is yet to be" and clearly, he spoke the truth. Every new day is the best. Do I take Kevin? Yes, still do...more than ever.....